Children’s birthday parties often start with squeals of delight and joyful anticipation but end in tears and swearing. From mum and dad, I hasten to add.
You see, us Generation X parents always want to do our best for our kids. Our mothers made us every single cake from The Australian Women’s Weekly Cake Cookbook when we were growing up and we feel responsible for ensuring our own kids have those same special memories of their birthdays.
So, yes, we can get carried away. Been there, done that, had the breakdown over the icing that wouldn’t set.
But this year I got smart. I managed to pull off a 5 year old party for 20 children with a fully home cooked menu without breaking a sweat, a nail or a plate over somebody’s head (usually, my unfortunate husband). A first for me.
So what was different about this year? Well, I had a think and came up with the following suggestions:
1. If you’re having more than 10 kids consider having it a venue other than your home. Unless of course you’re ridiculously flush and have a separate party room in the children’s wing. In which case, we’re having our party at your house next year! We ended up hiring the Church hall where we usually have playgroup on a Thursdays. The hall came with all manner of indoor and outdoor toys (there was an enclosed outdoor area that got a good workout), kid size tables and chairs, trestle tables and chairs and a fully equipped and stocked kitchen with two ovens. This was brilliant as it meant that we only had to bring in our decorations, games, food and drink. And yes, there was a bit of cleaning up afterwards but there wasn’t the angst and anxiety that results when you have twenty sugar-hyped pre-schoolers running through your own house. A definite plus.
2. Keep the party short and sweet. Kids mainline on adrenaline and sugar before melting down when they’ve had too much. 90 minutes is plenty for children up to 5 years.
3. Make it structured. Allow 20 minutes of free play at the beginning, followed by 3 games (Pass the Parcel, Musical Bums and Treasure Hunt), which will take another 20 minutes followed by the meal and cake (20 minutes). This gives a clear 30 minutes at the end for people to continue playing and eating. Stand by the door with the lolly bags when it’s about 10 minutes to closing time.
4. Keep the menu simple and do as much in advance as possible. I went with four savoury dishes (ham & pineapple pizzas, sausage rolls, oven chips and microwave popcorn) and five sweet dishes (fairy wands, flower biscuits, cupcakes, froot loop necklaces and a fruit plate), plus the cake. I made the fairy wands (grissini dipped into melted chocolate and rolled in sprinkles) and necklaces (fruitloops threaded onto string) the day before with some help from Ms 5 Year Old and baked the flower biscuits (cutout biscuit made into star shapes, dotted with a smartie and inserted with a toothpick) and cake the night before. I then decorated the cake the morning of the party while my husband baked the sausage rolls (Coles butter puff pastry + Standom sausage mince). He made the pizzas at the venue (bought pizza bases, Leggos pizza sauce, Standom Virginian ham and Coles pizza cheese) while I was setting up the room and the McCain chips were a cinch in the oven. My helpful mum chipped in with the fruit plates and my lovely sister in law made some gorgeous cupcakes. This meant that our time at the venue was about setting up rather than preparing. Also, don’t bother making separate food for the adults; most adults love the nostolgia of kids’ party food and happily chow down on anything that’s on offer. I just double the quantities that I’m making for the kids so that their parents can enjoy some, too.
5. Don’t kill yourself trying to make the perfect cake. I’m a terrible icer. Having been through the 12 step program, I’m OK with that now. Seriously though, my cakes are fairly dismal creations, especially when seen against the stunning, professional looking cakes made by my BF and my sister in laws (in reality I only have one sister in law but I’m claiming her sister as well because she’s such a rockstar). But so what? My daughter is just as happy with my lopsided, sloppily iced creation. So relax about the cake.
6. Try to coordinate the decorations, invitations, cake and theme but don’t worry if things don’t match perfectly. My daughter started off wanting a Tinkerbell party, then a Supergirl party, then a Princess party and then we were back to Tinkerbell. So we had Tinkerbell and home-made invitations, Disney Princess and Cars table settings, Tinkerbell balloons, a lolly basket cake, and a half fancy-dress theme (I put fancy dress on half of the invitations and forgot for the other half, oops).
7. Have someone babysit your kids on the morning of the party. This will give you have a clear run at the last-minute things. Also, while kids are generally fresher and less crankier in the mornings, an afternoon party gives you time to prepare without necessitating a 5am wake up time.
8. Factor in time to have a shower and change your clothes. You’ll instantly feel much calmer and more prepared to greet your guests with a smile. I hate it when guests are arriving while I’m frantically trying to change my clothes and do my hair. Instant downer.
9. Use whatever resources you have available. The jewellery trees I used to hang the fruit loops are mine and my daughter’s (handmade by my clever husband). They make stunning centrepieces for a kid’s party. The pink camellias that decorate the table so beautifully are from a friend of my dad’s who lives a minute away from the venue. And the white tablecloths are my mother’s.
10. Accept all offers of help. Friends and family will offer to make food or mind the kids. Accept all offers graciously. And ask people to help out on the day, too.
11. Relax and enjoy yourself. This party is for your kid and they won’t actually notice most of the things you do to make their day special. But they will notice a stressed, tense parent constantly apologising to the guests for all the things that she didn’t quite manage to do. So relax and enjoy yourself – that’s what will make the day truly memorable for all of you.
